In Comm 150-01 we just talked about observing the Praiseworthy Principle. When we catch other people doing good things or doing things well, we actually help them feel drawn to doing more and more things that are "praiseworthy."
We discussed the situation of a single mother who would be away from her children sometimes for days on end because of her work. Another woman would come stay with her children while she was gone. This woman began to express concern about the misbehavior of the children. The mother began to post a
Check out the comments below from these students who are really learning how to listen empathically.
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Capture: Praising someone is more effective then finding the faults in someone.
In class today we learned how to become more effective in our learning towards one another. We also learned how we can change ones behavior through praising.
Relevance: (ways it can be used in life)
1. When we are babysitting (as an example used in class today)
2. In the work place
3. In the home when we teach our children
Apply: I am 9 months pregnant and I am going to apply this principle to my new child. If we start them out small then they will learn how to praise people and build their character up, instead of finding the faults in people.
Teach: I have taught this principle to my husband.
Report: We will try to become better parents because of this principle.
principles learned:
• if there is anything in a person that is lovely, praiseworthy, or of good report, let them know you recognize it!
• recognize the good in people—try to ignore the bad.
apply these principles:
• don’t be afraid to give compliments
• instead of even realizing the bad and trying to ignore it, try not to even recognize it. look so positively into people that all i am able to see is the goodness
teach: to james
report:
when i shared with james the idea of ignoring the bad in people and acknowledging the good, his response was that everyone doing so would result in an unrealistic world. he said if we ignore in the bad in people then we would trust those we shouldn't trust and that would cause more problems. i recognized then that we are not to completely ignore the bad in people, rather we should forgive them of their weaknesses and concentrate on their strengths, and turning their weaknesses into strengths.
Key Principles
Today in class we learned about changing relationships. Bro. Adams talked about the babysitter and the kids who changed their negative relationships to positive ones. I thought it was very interesting how different treatment created different behaviors. At first when the kids did something bad the sitter wrote what they did on the fridge where everyone could see. She focused on negative things. When all we see and hear is negative it tends to rub off on us. Kids thrive on attention like we all do, and sometimes they do bad things to get that attention. When the sitter and the kids focused on the things they did right then both of them were happy.
Relevance
We all want to be liked and noticed for the things we do right. Everyone performs better when they feel good about themselves. Treating people positively will help any relationship. Saying but makes people focus on what is coming next and what they did wrong. If you say and it will help others see what you have to say because it is positive
Application
I want to apply this principle of finding the positive things people do with my roommates. It seems like I am always doing the dishes and cleaning up after them. Maybe if I would praise them for picking up their shoes or putting their dishes in the dishwasher they would do it more often. This will be kind of difficult, but I want to put this lesson into practice.
Teach
I will teach this to my roommate Karah.
Report
I tried this a little bit today. When my roommate left her shoes, computer cord, and dishes everywhere I put the dishes in the sink and praised her for taking the trash out.
Key Principles: Today we spoke on pointing out that which people do right; a positive principle that not only boosts the confidence and develops trust with those praised, but (oops used the forbidden word- however, I think this just might be an appropriate context:) also pyschologically makes them respond more positively. By learning to recognize the good in others, we will have a fuller capacity to communicate, affect other's behavior, and become true disciples of Christ.
Relevance: I can say that the times I have succeeded most have been those instances in which my mentors and teachers have applied this principle. I realized this my sophomore year, when I was struggling in ballet and flourishing in piano. I told my sister that I liked that my piano teacher prefaced her constructive criticism with praise- not in a false way, but in a truly instructive way that made me believe that that which she criticised me on could become my best. On the other hand, I had been led to believe I was doomed to fail in ballet- because, it seemed, I never did anything right. This is not to say that the learning lies in the ability of the teachers- quite the contrary; we must "act and not be acted upon"- but it certainly makes students more responsive if they can pick out those things they do well, in addition to areas for improvement. People will rise to the occasion!
Apply: I am going to consciously apply this in all aspects of my life; especially work. I have worked with children a lot before, and have jobs lined up this summer to do so again, and I believe this is a great technique to get the most out of them. I also want to try this on my roommates in association with their behavior. I have a sarcastic roommate who sometimes hurts others with her seemingly harmless remarks, and I am going to point out to her those times when she is being sincerely nice in the hope that it will become a regular habit.
I believe in this one a lot! People do great things when they fill good about themselves. We should all try to make other people happy. The compliments I like giving to other people are the compliments I have enjoyed receiving from others.
Accountability & Praiseworthy Principle
January 26, 2007
Principle Learned:
1.When we try to be more accountable for our own action, we are able to consciously engage in the improvement of our own action. Then, we can observe how each of our action influence others. When we learn and are taught, we act upon the knowledge to step forward the change of our own.
2.Other people might be puzzled and confused at the change of our communication style in the course of making an effort to be accountable for our action. It is partly because our change make it necessary for them to change themselves as well in response to our change. Making a change in ourselves as well as others is not always comfortable nor easy task. However, we can do it easier as we try to make it our daily habit. So, do not be apprehensive about making and seeing changes.
3.Praiseworthy principle is a part of the effective ways of being accountable for our action. However, it is beyond our action. It holds other's action as well. We tend to underestimate each of our action that influence others. Unfortunately, we also underestimate the contribution of others to you. However, as we actively observing positive outcomes of other people's action, we are able to come to realize and appreciate the significance of their being in our life. As a result, we establish trustworthy relationship on which our communication should be built.
4. Let's make changes in the world by being creative and productive for the benefit of not only ourselves but also others. We can start this project with blogging what we learn from the class to share it with others. It is crucial but a great privilege for us to be a part of this great technically advanced dispensation of the Gospel. We are expected to utilize the technology for goodness and even for the salvation of others.
"Verily I say, men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness; For the power is in them ,where in they are agents unto themselves. And inasmuch as men do good they shall in nowise lose their reward." (DC 58:27-28)
Personal Application:
1. I am preparing to open a new blog intended to share information about Brigham Young University of Hawaii, which I attended before transferring to BYU-Idaho, with those who plan to study abroad. There is a growing number of Japanese (my home country) students who want to go to university in U.S.A. As far as I know, there are very few web sites for Japanese people that show practical and detail information about BYUH. I believe that I can make a great use of the class learning here on the new blog.
2. Since I learned at the class that sharing information through writing is also a part of communication, I want to seek for ways to learn and use effective writing to communicate well with someone I already know and also someone I have never known.
3. Practice a praiseworthy principle to my roommate and my friends. Let's see the result....
What is virtue in communications?
This was the topic of today's class. If we choose to only bring up the bad or mention the things that someone does wrong or doesn't do particularly well we are robbing ourselves of good communicating skills as well as making life more stressful for another person.
When we take the time and effort to point out the good or the positive in other peoples lives, they then can come to appreciate that you have taken notice. This can spur all different kinds of reactions. You may have a direct effect that will cause them to be happier or feel better inside or you could have a subtle effect where over time you can see changes that they have made as a result of your optimistic complimentary approach.
Lastly I would like to comment on the use of the words and and but. It is true that when the word but is used improperly we can cancel out even the great things we say to people. For example: You did a great job on your paper, but.... Once we have let that awful word leave our mouth the other person has already forgotten anything that they might have done well. With the use of and instead of but, we can have a more meaningful and less degrading or demeaning approach. For example: You did great on your paper and.... The difference that one word can make in a conversation may be the edge or downfall to having a good conversation. Be careful what you say and how you say it. When we are kind enough to respect others in our conversations we will be respect more by others.
Spencer Tracy
The main thing we talked about in class today is the power of “pointing out the positive.” This is something I’ve had to work on in my own life, in my youth and in high school, I always had very negative friends, and it wore on me, in the end I had a horrible self-esteem, however, as I prepared myself for and left on my mission, I began to see the power in positive reinforcement, especially from a leadership perspective. Getting rid of the “but” also helped. In times my comments changed from: “You’re a great missionary, but you need to get up on time,” to: “You’re a great missionary, and I know you can overcome this and get up on time.” (this is a very general example) The same problem is addressed, however, I began to notice that those I spoke to this way, began to do everything they could to improve. Pointing out people’s positive characteristics seems to allow them to draw better on inward strength, to overcome whatever their shortcomings are, and as we focus more and more on the good, we seem to minimize the bad that we see in others, and build much stronger relationships simply because the little things just don’t bother us anymore.
Now I was at my sister’s house today doing laundry, having a discussion with her on this topic, as with others, but as we were speaking, I realized, this was something that just came naturally to her. I was trying to teach her this principle we learned in communications class, but in the process I learned that she’s done it all along. It was great watching her teach her eldest (He starts kindergarten in the fall) how to read, and not once was it “You didn’t say this right” or “that letter doesn’t make that sound” The whole time I heard “Great job, you just read a new word” or if he didn’t get it “Oh that was so close, try again.” And that’s the point we should reach in our lives, pointing out good things should become something we do naturally, not just something we do for our communications class.
Capture
The impact that searching for positive things makes on a person.
Relevence
People respond better when you point out positive things they have done
Use words like "And" instead of "but" so that it doesnt push aside the things youve said
Pointing out negative things reminds people that they are a failure, which can be a burden.
Apply
Someday when little kids come my way ill praise them about the positive things they do rather then pointing out the negative things
Teach
I told Eliot my neighbor about how using "And" instead of "But" can have a more positive impact on a conversation because it doesnt push aside the the points that you made earlier. Its a helpful habit to get accustomed to
Report
I had a conversation yesterday with a friend of mine, she said that a man actually went as far as to name two of his kids "winner" and "loser" as an experiment. As absolutely bizzare as it sounds the kid named Winner acutaully went on to be convicted of a number high crimes and is now serving time in prison. Where as the kid named Loser goes by the name "Lou" and has become a succseful business man. Very very curious
January 26, 2007
I am really excited about the “Praiseworthy Principal.” I think this is something we talk about all the time in church without really applying it (at least that is my experience with it). I found it really useful to actually plan out ways to execute the “Praiseworthy Principal” by noting the good and ignoring the bad and also getting rid of “but” statements by substituting “and.” This principal is so simple yet it is just human nature to find fault in one another. I think once this principal is applied over and over, until it becomes a part of our character, our relationships with everyone we come into contact with will change. We will be able to lift those we love instead of bringing them down. This principal in a way is just another method of serving one another. We have been commanded to love our neighbor and serve them. By applying the “Praiseworthy Principal” in our daily communications we will be uplifting and serving those around us.
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Ryan Worthen's Blog
Saturday, January 27, 2007
Blog for 1/26/07
Capture
Today in class we went over some of the things that are expected of us. Brother Adams shared with us the grading outline and introduced some new things that would occur during a class. Some of these are: 1) The class host will use 1 Bible scripture and 1 other scripture from the standard works. 2) There will be a videographer in class. 3) There will be a artographer in class.
The importance of blogging was stressed.
If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. We are to bring out the good in people.
Don't say but, say and when helping others.
Relevance: The importance of blogging
How are we to communicate in the new world? Blogging is a new form of communication that allows us to reach many people.
We have a responsibility as members of the church to share the gospel. By blogging and sharing our values and ideas people will be able to gain a positive outlook about our church.
Blogging can become of form of income through the use of AdSense provided by Google.
Apply
This principle will be applies into my blogs throughout the rest of the semester.
Teach
I have taught roommates and others about blogging. Some have visited my blog.
Key Principles:
-We need to notice anything about others that is "lovely, praiseworthy, or of good report."
-If you only point out the bad in people, they will think that is all they are.
-Pointing out the positive can make a big difference.
Relevance:
I think we can best apply these princples at church, home, work, and school. When we strive to see the good in others, we are becoming more like our Savior, Jesus Christ. He is our perfect example and we need to be like him "at all times, and in all things, and in all places."
Apply:
I am definitely going to apply the "praiseworthy princple" in the work place. I am going to ask my manager if we can put a poster board up of all the associates names and then report their good works. I think this will motivate people to do better and give them confidence in their skills and talents.
As learned from a story from our Communications class a large majority of the problem that we may be fixated upon is not searching for praiseworthy things, and focus solely on the negative and completely consumes us and the great problem with communicating with people may be our self. By commenting or focusing on the positive that others do it will cause them to reflect and want to be that person that you comment on that is positive. As the old saying goes “If you cant say anything nice, don’t say anything at all. Tyson Rothwell
Today we discussed some of the maintenance tasks for things that we have to do for the rest of the semester with our blogs. I was able to learn some things that went on last class with the starting of learning how to listen empathically. I learned that it is a lot harder to do that because of the agenda that we place ourselves on so many times. It is hard to take time to reflect the feelings of the other person that is talking because you are too busy thinking about what you will say next. I also learned how our autobiographical responses really do control the way that we act unless we make the conscious effort to change that and actually listen to people.
Being positive
It's important to project a positive feeling always. I troubled person needs to feel the presence of hope even if the situation show very little. We need to use tools to take every negative thing out of our speach. An example of that would be to use an AND instead of a BUT as a conjuction, leading to a praisemorthy priciple. Just make surre it's not to cheesy and fake positivity because the person can feel if you are not being sincere.
Application- I play hockey but am still learning to play on ice so I suck. Unfortunately, most of the other players haven't even played organized hockey and so they are in my same boat. My point is that we all suck and so we all try to compliment each other on anything we do good because we want to have fun and feel good about ourselves even though most of us suck!
I am going to teach this to my friend Kenny in california. He plays on my roller hockey team over there and he sucks too.
capture
Observation
1. We will be doing a new layout for class.
2. Class did not get nearly as involved today.
3. We can put our pictures online through photobucket.com
Relevance
1. We need to be more optimistic
2. Think of things that are virtuous, lovely, praiseworthy, or of good report.
3. Comment to other peoples blogs.
Apply
I am going to think of things more as being good instead of giving to conviniance and thinking of somthing being bad. I think that if I do this I will be a lot happier.
Teach.
I will teach my friend Kendall Brady.
Gossip is a great way to clear out an emotional bank account, I would say. In an emotional bank account there are deposits and withdrawls the same as if you wrote out a check from a check book. Every time your loyal or do something to add that persons trust creates a + balance, however when you do something such as gossiping and they get wind of it a large withdrawl occurs which might not balance with your deposits of good that you do causing you to be in the red or be in the negative so to say. The key is not gossiping and looking for the good instead of the bad that we most commonly do especially for guys as it's a way to compare and measure up so to say depending on the person. Listening is just like a muscle the more you use it the stronger and better it gets however if you put it in a sling is withers and looses strength. So when listening we need to listen empathetically, and reflect back meaningful feeling and the content they told you about.
http://www.psncc.org/empathic_listening.html
"Start with the intent to connect. Don't get cuaght up with 'Doing it right'. It's not about being clever. Sometimes even just connecting silently is plenty. It's your intent that counts."
Saturday, January 27, 2007
NASA and Technology
Claudiu Bora
We have five areas of debate:
People
Organization
Market
Technology
Capital
We where part of the technology where we had.
1) Change
2) Operation
3) Strategic
Well first NASA didn’t make to much updates in the program which could affected the Columbia mission. They where aware about the updates and having some equipment since the 60 and 70s doesn’t really help to accomplish a mission.
Second the operation of the program didn’t run as well as they thought it will in a very critical situation. Mistake where made but the problem wasn’t totally there because the entire operation stumble aver more than one problem at the time. Took to much time to see the problem to consider the problem to resolve the problem and to get feedback and analyzed the problem.
Third as a strategy I think NASA didn’t had one they expected that things will be ok and that lead to a lot of panic when things didn’t go well. Having a back up plan will help a lot because they will be able to have a team ready to be able to report, react and act faster by having totally access to all the Channels of communication in NASA.
As a technology team in the class we all agreed that technology was a big part of the failure of Columbia but also of some other missions.
In the survey that we did out of the 20 question we evaluate NASA and we came up with 1been as a very poor job eight times with 2 one time with 3 nine times with 4 two times and with 5 one time. I think NASA is doing something good too is not a totally a disaster but there are a lot of area of concerns when is coming to the technology.
So we came up with some question:
1) What is the strategy to change NASA?
2) How is NASA going to deal with the future missions?
3) How we get people to trust the NASA program?
4) How will you plan to make people in the NASA to be heard from each level in the organization?
5) What will be the other ways too justifies the funding?
6) How will you organize better communications channels?
7) How often should NASA do upgrades?
8) Who decided that the technology is too old?
9) How much level of responsibility should be given to the staff?
10) How you will make people to communicate?
As a group we conclude it that the program itself is not very efficient because some of the founds are not very well manage and they end up no be invested in the areas where they should like technology. Without the advance technology is hard to be successful and have safe missions. I think NASA is gambling each time when they live technology not been a priority in the program. So I think that NASA should look to the program and as themselves where is NASA going to be ten years from now fifty years from now one hundred years from now.
http://claudiubora.blogspot.com/
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